Running Shoes

I had lost my temper. So had littlest one. Throwing an expensive toy that was gift against her wall. Flesh isn't always taught...or caught. Sometimes it's just the kind born with. Source not mattering, all Savior needing. But it can shock a mama. When her toddler displays such outburst. And grieve when my own ugly follows suit in response. Three or thirty-three, she and I, Savior craving. Mornings like these, all this grasping for those new mercies. Are they playing hide and seek? 

 

I need shoes. Running shoes. Not for running away, but rather for staying. Staying in the hard and winning all the little battles. Running shoes to grip, and grapple, to traction my way into grace. So I go with tired bare feet. I reach for socks, I find shoes. Only God makes putting on running shoes a holy moment. I put them on. First the socks...soul breaths... Then the shoes. Soul reaches and grabs the chance to grip. 

Sometimes we just need to put on running shoes to stay. To stay and run this race set before us today.

After all. Jesus always has His on.

Endlessly chasing me with love and graces. Wanting me to know I am never alone. That in this race I have to run, He is pursuing and helping coach. Wiping my sweat, words encouraging, 

" you got this. I AM right here. Keep going. A little more... We've trained for this. I am right here."

Like music He sings courage into the runners heart. Into my heart. A song that calms. A song that revives courage and strengthens thighs and calves to pound out the truth of Him on asphalt of earth. 

To find God on earth road, put the shoes on. Let Him show His presence where grip meets earth. You will gain ground. Even if clouds are slow to part. He never makes us run alone. But we are in a race. And sitting and throwing mud clots doesn't bring the finishing tape's color any closer. It just wastes time. This valuable precious time. Moments of holy are what we are given. Only we can dirty them. So get up. Stop flinging and start stretching. This is what we train for. To grip and gain through everyday grime. Run through all this monotony and make art. That is grace.

There are a lot of days I slow cause all I see is the other runners around me. How they are faster, more agile. How many are ahead. And sometimes in admittance to my pride, how many I have passed by. Comparison puts lead in my shoes. Always has. It plugs up my ears from hearing my coach. This heaven song telling me how I am supposed to run, how I am supposed to pace myself. Because it's not about winning. It's about  the run along the way. The journey. Sometimes running well means letting others get ahead. Sometimes winning the moment means forgiving the one who just tripped us. Still others it's in stopping and helping the one who feels they can't go on. It's a Kingdom race. A race of paradoxical rules and realities. A race we only win when tuned in to our coaches voice. Telling us what pace we should keep and what route we should take.  Some are for the Everest hills. The huge and impressive feat winners... But for some like me, it's the call to Joy in the face of motherhood hardship and everyday mundane. Cause treading out His beauty here matters. 

Your race matters to God.

What He has called YOU to is of utmost value to Him. To His kingdom here.

He is there to whisper those words that give us courage to keep believing what's hard. To keep running when legs feel jello. In His kindness He knows we are but dust. ( Psalm 103:14)  And in His kindness He never leaves us to run alone. 

Don't look at the other runners. Don't look behind and see if your better than someone else. Why their route looks different than yours. Grander? Easier? More glorious? Perhaps harder... More "unfair"? Other peoples callings are not yours. Respect God and leave them be to Him. Know WHO loves you...let that inspire you to let loose in the shoes He chose for your feet. Then remember what His love means to you, how personal it is, and then give it away. To the ones running ahead. To the ones beside you. And to any behind. Because we aren't racing AGAINST one another. We are racing for a more beautiful reason. This invitation to know Him on this crazy terra ferma. 

Know Him well, and slipping turns to gripping. Gripping turns to gaining. And gaining turns to seeing more beautiful territory of His life and heart. 

There is. No greater. Reward.

Today if my ramblings find you tired...It's ok. Weariness is a stone I trip on regularly. Wondering if you have been given a road that's worthy? A route that has purpose and will honor Him well? You have friend. You have. Believe He is beauty here and " your weak" becomes a megaphone story of His strong. And the colors at the end? "Well done child. Well done."

" Help me, O Lord, my God; Save me according to Thy lovingkindness. AND LET THEM KNOW THAT THIS IS THY HAND; THOU, LORD, HAS DONE IT."

Thou. My sweet Jesus has done it.

May it be said of my race.

Take heart. You don't run alone.