When Hard Things Happen

Headlines. Most days I hate them. This glorifying the horror. The write up of the unkind, mean, dirty, and sometimes evil people. We write about all this ugly. Report out loud all this vile. So it spreads. Fear in most people, complacency in some, and evil ideas in others. Most days we should just keep our pens and mouths shut about all this ugly... And I wonder what would happen if we reported the kind, healing, heart lifting things at the exact speed and coverage we do the shattering... Young teens wouldn't have ideas given them so easily as avenues to blow all their hate and hurt in school hallways. Evil men wouldn't get as blatant encouragement to follow deranged thoughts into actions against the helpless little girl. We all need a Savior. We all are fallen.... We would mess up each other's lives even if media wasn't so foolish... But I believe the speed and widespread problems would be less. Way less.  Sometimes I sit and am just amazed at the foolishness of news anchors and lofty networks. It's sad. Really sad. 

Glorify sin, and you'll lose sight of light.

Man our news stations are dark.

It's not gonna stop. I am no fool. I won't campaign against the stupidity of news rooms. We will hear things that make our heart ill. That stop our breath and tempt us to fear. For those we hear about, for those we love, for ourselves. But we don't have to spread it.

When we hear about her. 10 years beautiful, taken and killed....  There comes this temptation. To question out of fear, out of anger. 

" Where", we ask, "was God? Why didn't He stop this?"

Our hearts sink at such evil. Against anyone, but especially a child. A little girl with life and laughter still fresh in her lungs...  Why horror? Why her?  Questions can haunt. Make sure you ask the right One. Because God won't ever leave you lost in darkness...even the kind birthed from suffocating questions that hang. He may not answer us probing like an angry reporter. But He answers in the utmost way. 

He answers with relationship.

We commonly ask why if God is so good... So kind... Why He allows horrible things to happen to the innocent.  This is in fact one of the most asked questions of the troubled soul.  I've been thinking about it. With heavy heart, I have found a piece I do know is true. And for me, it soothes. Maybe my ponder ramble moment will help you too. 

Just this. We chose sin a long time ago. Eve and Adam in breathtaking garden... They chose the hunger for knowledge as greater good than walking in friendship with God Himself in the cool of the day. Baffling.  But let's be honest. Don't we all make that same mistake daily? I baffle myself. 

 

In one bite of fruit, perfection was forfeited. Unbroken relationship and unbroken earth snapped. How God's heart must have broken loudest. His creation choosing the created and hunger for power over all the love they had been knowing. Intimately knowing with God Himself. 

What was left was just that. Brokenness. Earth flowers battle weeds. Women groan in childbirth. Men toil endlessly to provide before the irony of the earth undoes all their labor. Animals fight animals. Thorns pierce our skin and our heart. But most grievingly, the human race has a severed relationship with God. Praise be to The Lord, our relationship doesn't have to stay this way because of Jesus!! Thank you Yeshua!  But still the world is fallen, broken, horribly flawed. And so is the human race...Soul broken.

In these horrible news moments when we hear aweful reports of such evil things... What we are seeing isn't an absent God, it's a fallen world. Hear that! 

In the horrors of this life, it's not an absent God we see... It's a broken world. 

A broken world.

We forget that. We forget that God didn't make Eve bite an apple that shattered perfect beauty. She chose that. SHE chose it. WE chose it.  Now this earth, and people without God, bare the ramifications of saying "other" is better than Knowing God. This pain is the "other" we chose. This knowledge we wanted "to be like God" has become our depraved history. Has become our crime scenes. Our news stands of hopelessness and ugly.  And yet we still wanna blame Him. Because He can stop it right?  

What we are really wanting is heaven here. Our souls are craving what should be. This reality of relationship sweet and earth divine and beautiful.  But we let go of that... And it cannot be again this side of life.  When we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord, it will be again. When we go home to be with Jesus. But here? Here we must endure the fruit of the seeds we planted. We said God wasn't  enough, the world and human soul broke, and this is the reality of now. 

But! There is hope. God doesn't withhold Himself. He doesn't leave us to this hard place alone. The goodness of God is that when we break away, He doesn't. He still made a way for us to come back to wholeness. He sent Jesus (John 3:16). He asked His son to endure horror at the hands of fallen, depraved men, to restore us to Himself. To repair the break between God and mankind. He won't force us to come to Him..,To ask His son to save us... But He made a way to bridge the break.

And for those of us who have taken His outstretched arms to heart...there is hope in a world gone terribly wrong. 

And when the hard to swallow things come... When the horrid pain happens... We aren't left to suffer heartlessly. His love brings heaven into all this hard. This love that He promises covers a multitude of sins. This love He promises that nothing can sever. Nothing ( Romans 8:38-39).

When we hear headlines rant gore... When we ache for the childless mother...When we cry at Autistic hurt, and disabled challenges... When we cannot wrap our head around the why... Remember what is true. Really true beneath it all. God isn't broken, the world is. 

His love stays in it. He didn't run from the moments you can't stop imagining on behalf of a victim. He was with them. He was with you.  His hands are always outstretched...wanting to bridge that gap you feel.

It's not a question anymore for me of why He didn't stop "it".  I know this place is not my home. The earth is marred. Scarred and groaning. And though I hate it's effects on my body, and my family and friends lives... I know my Redeemer lives!  I know I am never alone. That horrid moments can become God moments in ways I won't ever understand. Because God is kind enough to stay in it, even when we broke it.

And for me, that relationship is everything. I don't smile on pain or it's wrenching effects... But I smile knowing I am not alone. 

That God is good, and I am always loved.

Today has hurt in it. I know. And I am sorry you ache friend. But know this. You don't have to bear up alone. He is near. 

Him. Always bridging the gap. 

You. Are Loved.

Please savor Savior here, in song "Mercy", by artist Phil Wickam:

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=h7ailmf2G7g&feature=kp

Running Shoes

I had lost my temper. So had littlest one. Throwing an expensive toy that was gift against her wall. Flesh isn't always taught...or caught. Sometimes it's just the kind born with. Source not mattering, all Savior needing. But it can shock a mama. When her toddler displays such outburst. And grieve when my own ugly follows suit in response. Three or thirty-three, she and I, Savior craving. Mornings like these, all this grasping for those new mercies. Are they playing hide and seek? 

 

I need shoes. Running shoes. Not for running away, but rather for staying. Staying in the hard and winning all the little battles. Running shoes to grip, and grapple, to traction my way into grace. So I go with tired bare feet. I reach for socks, I find shoes. Only God makes putting on running shoes a holy moment. I put them on. First the socks...soul breaths... Then the shoes. Soul reaches and grabs the chance to grip. 

Sometimes we just need to put on running shoes to stay. To stay and run this race set before us today.

After all. Jesus always has His on.

Endlessly chasing me with love and graces. Wanting me to know I am never alone. That in this race I have to run, He is pursuing and helping coach. Wiping my sweat, words encouraging, 

" you got this. I AM right here. Keep going. A little more... We've trained for this. I am right here."

Like music He sings courage into the runners heart. Into my heart. A song that calms. A song that revives courage and strengthens thighs and calves to pound out the truth of Him on asphalt of earth. 

To find God on earth road, put the shoes on. Let Him show His presence where grip meets earth. You will gain ground. Even if clouds are slow to part. He never makes us run alone. But we are in a race. And sitting and throwing mud clots doesn't bring the finishing tape's color any closer. It just wastes time. This valuable precious time. Moments of holy are what we are given. Only we can dirty them. So get up. Stop flinging and start stretching. This is what we train for. To grip and gain through everyday grime. Run through all this monotony and make art. That is grace.

There are a lot of days I slow cause all I see is the other runners around me. How they are faster, more agile. How many are ahead. And sometimes in admittance to my pride, how many I have passed by. Comparison puts lead in my shoes. Always has. It plugs up my ears from hearing my coach. This heaven song telling me how I am supposed to run, how I am supposed to pace myself. Because it's not about winning. It's about  the run along the way. The journey. Sometimes running well means letting others get ahead. Sometimes winning the moment means forgiving the one who just tripped us. Still others it's in stopping and helping the one who feels they can't go on. It's a Kingdom race. A race of paradoxical rules and realities. A race we only win when tuned in to our coaches voice. Telling us what pace we should keep and what route we should take.  Some are for the Everest hills. The huge and impressive feat winners... But for some like me, it's the call to Joy in the face of motherhood hardship and everyday mundane. Cause treading out His beauty here matters. 

Your race matters to God.

What He has called YOU to is of utmost value to Him. To His kingdom here.

He is there to whisper those words that give us courage to keep believing what's hard. To keep running when legs feel jello. In His kindness He knows we are but dust. ( Psalm 103:14)  And in His kindness He never leaves us to run alone. 

Don't look at the other runners. Don't look behind and see if your better than someone else. Why their route looks different than yours. Grander? Easier? More glorious? Perhaps harder... More "unfair"? Other peoples callings are not yours. Respect God and leave them be to Him. Know WHO loves you...let that inspire you to let loose in the shoes He chose for your feet. Then remember what His love means to you, how personal it is, and then give it away. To the ones running ahead. To the ones beside you. And to any behind. Because we aren't racing AGAINST one another. We are racing for a more beautiful reason. This invitation to know Him on this crazy terra ferma. 

Know Him well, and slipping turns to gripping. Gripping turns to gaining. And gaining turns to seeing more beautiful territory of His life and heart. 

There is. No greater. Reward.

Today if my ramblings find you tired...It's ok. Weariness is a stone I trip on regularly. Wondering if you have been given a road that's worthy? A route that has purpose and will honor Him well? You have friend. You have. Believe He is beauty here and " your weak" becomes a megaphone story of His strong. And the colors at the end? "Well done child. Well done."

" Help me, O Lord, my God; Save me according to Thy lovingkindness. AND LET THEM KNOW THAT THIS IS THY HAND; THOU, LORD, HAS DONE IT."

Thou. My sweet Jesus has done it.

May it be said of my race.

Take heart. You don't run alone.